Crime Dog

<--   23 July 2004   -->

# 5 ~ FOX (promo'd but unaired)
# 5 ~ VisionTV
# 5 ~ Télé-Québec
# 5 ~ DVD
# 5 ~ logo
Wonderfalls, 'Crime Dog' Jaye ends up in jail when she and Aaron attempt to smuggle their deported Canadian housekeeper back into the country.

Inside a police station, Officer Sloan interrogates Sharon about Jaye, who's been placed under arrest. In the adjacent interrogation room, Jaye cups her hands over the two-way mirror in an attempt to see what's on the other side. She asks if anyone wants to speak with her. Suddenly, a cardboard display featuring MacGuffin the Crime Dog comes to life. Jaye gets into an argument with Crime Dog, but quickly settles down when Officer Hale enters the room and instructs Jaye to describe what happened to the family's housekeeper before she ended up in the trunk of a car.

Several days earlier, Dad, Aaron and Mom enjoy a delicious pancake breakfast prepared by their Canadian housekeeper, Yvette, who speaks with a French accent. Jaye enters the kitchen with a bag of laundry, and Yvette offers to make her a pancake as well. Jaye turns down the offer, but the cow creamer on the kitchen table comes to life and tells Jaye to have one. Aaron accuses Jaye of conversing with the cow creamer, but Jaye denies it. Moments later, Sharon tells Mom that there's an emergency cleanup job in the bathroom, where the toilet has overflowed. But Jaye has changed her mind about having a pancake, and Yvette is reluctant to abandon the stove. Moments later, two members of the I.N.S. show up and announce that a warrant exists for Yvette's deportation.

Later, Aaron shows up at the Wonderfalls shop with the cow creamer in hand. He again accuses Jaye of talking to inanimate objects, and moments later, the creamer tells Jaye to bring Yvette home. Aaron and Jaye agree that something must be done to bring Yvette back, especially since it was Sharon, who works as an immigration attorney, who got Yvette deported in the first place. Later, Aaron and Jaye confront Sharon about what she did. Sharon explains that Yvette's name showed up on a list at work that very morning, and she had been unaware that Yvette has been living in the US on an expired visa since the early 1980s. Now, the I.N.S. has put Yvette on a bus headed for Canada.

Mom and Dad discuss the Yvette situation. Mom admits she's known about Yvette's illegal status for quite some time. Jaye chimes in, telling her parents they've got to do something to get Yvette back. But Dad remarks that the entire situation is very sad and walks away. Mom then wonders aloud where the bus could be taking Yvette. A short time later, Aaron and Jaye head for the Canadian border. As they wait in line at the border checkpoint, Aaron again pulls out the cow creamer and demands to know why Jaye was talking to it. An argument erupts...and they attract the attention of border patrol officers, who question them about their trip. Later, Aaron and Jaye drive to a bus station, where they spot Yvette exiting a public bathroom. Jaye and Aaron tell her they're going to drive her back to the United States. But Yvette insists she'll get arrested, because her passport was taken away. Aaron and Jaye tell her to hide in the trunk of their car. Although she's heartened by their support, Yvette refuses to put either of them in jeopardy, and insists she's staying in Canada. Unfortunately, she's broke and has nowhere to stay. Jaye and Aaron refuse to abandon Yvette at the bus station and drive off with her in the backseat. As they try to figure out what to do next, the cow creamer tells Jaye to make a right turn at a red light. Jaye does what the creamer says...and ends up going down a oneway street the wrong way. She ends up crashing into the yard of a house. The owners turn out to be Yvette's parents, Helen and Fred.

It turns out that Yvette ran away from home when she got pregnant at a young age. Yvette and her parents have been estranged ever since. Soon after, a fight erupts between Yvette and her parents. Yvette says she ran off because they were never caring and, in their own way, held the door open for her. Jaye becomes so upset with the rapidly deteriorating situation that she climbs into the car and demands the cow creamer do something to fix it. The cow creamer tells Jaye to bring Yvette home. Moments later, Aaron and Fred get into a fight...and Fred strikes Aaron in the jaw. Jaye gets out of the car and punches back, sending Fred to the ground. Jaye and Aaron then talk Yvette into climbing into the trunk. But when they reach the Canadian border, they get pulled over. As police order Aaron and Jaye out of the vehicle, they wonder how they figured out Yvette was hiding in the trunk. Then a cigarette-smoking figure emerges from the shadows. It turns out to be Sharon.

Jaye, Aaron and Yvette are taken into custody. At the police station, Sharon insists she didn't tip-off the authorities. She showed up at the border when police tipper her off. Sharon tells Jaye the Canadians are furious and have already filed extradition papers to try Jaye in their country, where she faces numerous charges, including reckless endangerment, vandalism and assault. And the United States want to charge her as well. Meanwhile, Yvette is going to be sent to a jail in the United States. But a short time later, Hale informs Jaye that the charges have been dropped. An elated Jaye finds Aaron, Sharon and Mom waiting for her nearby. Jaye thanks her sister for pulling strings, but it turns out that her freedom wasn't Sharon's doing--Dad had placed a phone call to a very important friend...and wrote a very large check to Yvette's parents. Later, Jaye realises that Dad also won Yvette's freedom--or at least a limited amnesty until she becomes an American. Everyone returns home, where Yvette makes pancakes...and Jaye realises the cow creamer is missing its head.

Script: 1AHM02-CrimeDog.pdf

Guest Cast: Colin Fox (Fred Bradley), Joan Gregson (Helen Bradley), Eldridge Hyndman (American Border Guard), Lise LeBel-Wagner (Elderly Yvette), Jeffrey R. Smith (Muse), James Carroll (Officer Donikian), Sandra Caldwell (Muse), Audrey Wasilewski (Yvette/Cindy Bradley), Kimberly Scott (Officer Hale), Mike Beaver (Border Patrol Officer #1), Marcus Bruce (Older Gardener), Victor Hammer (Muse), Bill Lake (Sloan)

Written by: Krista Vernoff   ·   Directed by: Allan Kroeker

Final Ratings: - / - in households   ·   - million viewers   ·   - / - among adults 18-49

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